Previously on Pdgn plays D&D: Jackal Dating Sim

Characters: John “Battle Boar” Ionescu (cSmith), Raz (ubuntor), Dingus Magee (assface), Vanswaxle Fearless Pants (JacobEdelman), Lucifirius (Lucifirius), and Ez-Ra (The_Master)


With the jackalweres from our previous session dealt with, our party loots them of their scimitars, some rations, and one pair of pants. They then continue on their way to Aki’ba. Two days pass and the party arrives in the trading post between Karri and Aki’ba. Somewhat tired from their journey, they find themselves heading to a tavern once more to relax a bit. In the mean time, Vanswaxle decides to purchase fine venison from a far-off land for several gold pieces. The merchant explains that the venison was imported from a forest kingdom to the far-north of which he has very little knowledge. He continues explaining that the venison was kept fresh by magic and that it travelled through a great number of caravans before arriving there. Also simultaneously, Lucifirus leaves the group in the tavern to search for more information about the local political climate. He determines that the best way to go about this is to seek out the commanding officer of the Aki’ba military in charge of the trading post. When he approaches his tent in the military camp grounds, guards block his way. However, with his great charm, he’s able to convince the guards to let him past as he has urgent news for the officer.

Once inside the tent, Lucifirius is met with a fairly gregarious man who introduces himself as Col. Keenu, the officer in charge of the trading post. Lucifirius explains that he is working with a trade caravan, and is seeking advice to ensure the caravan’s safety. Col. Keenu advises him to stay to the east of the trading post. He explains that the military presence is much stronger near Aki’ba and the Enku River, and that this is the best bet to stay safe. Curious, Lucifirius asks if there have been any issues with bandits, and Keenu explains that there have been recent issues with the Mehrabya expanding beyond their borders and attacking Aki’ba caravans and military scouting parties. Lucifirius thanks Keenu for the help, and begins to leave. Before he goes, Keenu tells him that if he runs into any trouble with the military, just let them know that Col. Keenu said he was okay. Then, Lucifirius leaves and returns to the party in the tavern. Soon after, our party heads off to Aki’ba to finish their grain delivery.

On the third night of their four night journey, during Raz’s watch, an invisible creature attacks. The creature sneaks up on Raz in the night, and quickly causes serious injuries. As a result of the sudden pain, Raz screams and awakens most of the party (except for the two warlocks, Vanswaxle and Lucifirius). Reacting to the likely danger, Ez-Ra decides to use his Mage Hand to awaken the two warlocks. With the whole party awake, they then struggle to find the creature that attacked Raz. Thinking quickly, Raz throws some sand in the air that hits the creature and reveals its location. The group then unleashes a swarth of magical attacks on the enemy. During this, the monster brutally assaults Dingus, once again resulting in serious injuries. Then, in an attempt to light it on fire, Vanswaxle pours a vial of alchemist’s fire in an area, but ultimately misses, lighting the ground on fire. Without thinking, Ez-Ra casts Web on the area which immediately catches fire and harms Dingus, Vanswaxle, and the monster. Fortunately, Battle Boar is on the scene and uses prayer of healing to keep the party alive. He uses his battle pigs to flank the invisible target, helping to mark its location for the rest of the group. After a rain of further magical attacks, the monster is eventually defeated. Once killed, a column of twirling air appears in its place, floating up into the sky, and ultimately dissipating. In its place, the party finds one-hundred-and-twenty gold pieces and a small note. Vanswaxle quickly picks up the note, and reads it to the party. The note is addressed to one Lord Calmigari from a Aki’ba resident named Dr. Frank D. Weiner. Dr. Weiner writes that the attached sum of gold is to be given to the Lord in exchange for his silence about a recent blunder in Karri by spies from the Aki’ba government. After his reading of the note, Ez-Ra feels suspicious of Jacob and demands to see the note, but upon reading it, it appears to say exactly that. Putting any suspicion aside, the party heads to Aki’ba to finally complete their delivery.

Upon their arrival into the city, Dingus sets off in search of cacti and the rest of the party goes to the market district to attempt to sell their grain. However, they get immediately distracted when Ez-Ra decides to investigate the local offerings of free samples. He finds a slew of free food samples, and one sample for an unusual magical beverage. The party takes interest in this magical beverage. Ez-Ra asks the old, bearded salesman what it is, and he explains that he’s unsure as nobody has been willing to drink it. Bravely, Ez-Ra takes a sample and drinks it down. Suddenly, he is able to jump considerably higher. Disinterested, Lucifirius runs off in search of Dingus, ultimately concerned for his safety. Suspicious of his intentions, Ez-Ra trails Lucifirius until he finds Dingus. Afterward, The two head to a local tavern, and Ez-Ra meets them there. Meanwhile, Vanswaxle and Raz continued to be enthralled with the magical elixir at the stand. They take many samples, and discover that despite this, the cauldron does not deplete. They then head to the tavern in search of the rest of the group. In the tavern, Ez-Ra decides to pour a vial of the magical beverage onto the cactus. It absorbs the liquid, and a void of darkness forms in a twenty-foot radius around the cactus. Still holding it, Dingus tosses the cactus across the room at the door. The sheer cold from the void causes the door to begin to crack and then to shatter. The group decides to keep the entire cauldron and goes to the stand to try to purchase it from the merchant. Vanswaxle makes an offensive offer of three copper pieces, and the merchant tells him to go away. However, the group bands together and threatens him causing him to run away screaming in fear. They then seize the cauldron and return to the tavern. Still enthralled by the magical liquid, Dingus throws a bottle at a chair. After a few seconds, the chair contorts and letters in Common begin to appear carved within it. The text details a biography of Dr. Frank D. Weiner explaining that he’s a doctor from Mehrabya who’s working with the rebels in Aki’ba. As part of his work with the rebels, he’s operating as a double agent within the Aki’ba government. Soon after realizing this, Raz and Ez-Ra notice two men in military uniforms looking around. Afraid that the military is after them, they quickly exit the tavern when Raz and Ez-Ra then notice a wizard in military uniform approaching.

Ez-Ra uses Detect Thoughts to peer into the mind of the wizard. He learns that his name is Craig, and that he was sent to investigate some sort of magical disturbance in the marketplace. It also appeared from his immediate thoughts that it wasn’t really made clear to him what was going on. Ez-Ra also learned that Craig was very hungry (particularly, he was craving mutton) and that he much preferred the idea of eating to investigating, but did not want to risk losing his job. Curious about Craig, Ez-Ra decides to delve deeper into his mind. He discovers that Craig is arranged to be married to a princess of Aki’ba, the third in line for the throne. However, he is torn between the decision to marry the princess, or to marry his true love, a poor vagrant currently holed up in an abandoned home. The conflict is driven by a hatred of his job and a need for financial security, indicating that the smart course of action might be to marry the princess and be able to stop working altogether. However, he doesn’t know that he’ll be happy, nor that he’d be okay giving up on the woman he loves. Knowing that Craig will be aware that someone has detected his thoughts, Ez-Ra uses suggestion to convince a passerby to bring Craig some mutton from the tavern and to tell him to follow his heart. Craig takes the advice and heads into the tavern to eat more mutton. Afterward, the party heads into the desert to further investigate the effects of this volatile magical liquid.

Outside of the city, the party attempts to pour the liquid on cactuses and sand to discern its effects. The first attempt causes a cactus to begin jumping, and Ez-Ra decides to perform a magical ritual to bond with the jumping cactus and to make it his familiar. The attempts continue resulting in variations of the already witnessed effects of jumping, magic text about an individual, and a bitterly cold void of darkness. After some testing, an additional effect reveals itself to be sudden teleportation within a small area. As night draws closer and the party grows weary, they return to the city and check into a hotel. At the hotel, Vanswaxle and Lucifirius reveal themselves to be Mehrabya rebels working against the government of Aki’ba. They explain that their contacts in the city have a vested interest in taking down the government, and that they’re willing to pay handsomely if the party were to break into the palace and use the couldron to wreak havok or even destroy it entirely. With some morally opposed to the evils of the authoritarian Aki’ba government and others just interested in getting paid, the party decides to take on the task to assault the palace. Vanswaxle then reaches out to his contacts in the hopes of finding blueprints for the palace to aid in their assault. As the party’s weariness grows further, they decide to rest before they begin their work in the morning.

To be continued next session.